As many of you know I returned to Haiti with Megan. For months I have been praying about coming. I went back in forth on if it was the right thing to do but finally we booked the tickets and started making plans and I am so thankful that I did.
Many people have asked me why I was going back. It was hard to answer that because even in my mind I wasn’t sure why but now sitting here, taking it all in God has given me such a clear answer. I had to come back and take a look back so I could move forward.
We left Haiti burned out. We left defeated and a bit wounded. During our time in Haiti the challenges were endless and left us wondering were God was in all of it. We came back and wanted to forget and we tried really hard to just wrap the memories in a nice box and put it away on a shelf somewhere never to open it again. The reality was that I didn’t want to forget. Haiti held so many memories for our family. It was our home for a season and we were forever changed by it.
We lived in the Grace House and God has been so gracious to me the last few days. You know when your going through a season of suffering and you wonder “why”. I wrestled with that for a long time, I couldn’t see the purpose of it all. Many of you don’t know the in and outs of our time in Haiti and the specific challenges we faced but it was complicated. We knew there were some changes that needed to happen and spoke into that often. Today friends, I can see clearly the purpose in the suffering. Our voice was heard. Changes have been made and God has filled me such a peace knowing that it wasn’t wasted. God has given me such a gift to see things with fresh eyes.
It has been so good seeing friends again. Talking with the staff again and even walk through the Grace House. It has been vacant since April and remodeled to welcome the new house parent who ironically moved down while we’ve been here...that’s how gracious our God is. I see bits and pieces of our life scattered around campus and it has been so good to just remember the sweet times we had here. We’ve been able to spend time with two of our kids we cared for and let me tell you I got the biggest hug from one! It was been so sweet to see how much progress that they both have made.
Romans 8:28 says “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him and have been called according to his purpose.” He sure does friends! Whatever your going through right now and you can’t see the good, don’t stop trusting, keep pressing on because He will show you and He will never waste ANYTHING.
I will leave this place on Tuesday with closure and that is only by God’s grace working in me.
Haiti and COTP, will always be a part of our life and I will choose not to forget because God has meant me in this place, over and over again and He has done a transforming work in me through all of it. To HIM be the glory!
